A Question of Masculinity… Can a
Man Wear a Pink Shoe?
In response to Jomo W. Mutegi’s initial book review of “How to be a Good Black Woman to a
Strong Black Man”
"Now before you start looking at me funny, let me be
clear. I am a man. I do not wear a pink shoe, nor do I advocate the wearing of
pink shoes" (Jomo W. Mutegi ).
I wonder why there is this constant need to qualify one's
self as a "man". Want to talk
about healing our children? Let's talk
about healing our sense of self! Healthy
individuals= healthy parents= healthy families= healthy children!
Culturally, are we on the right side of the discussion/
acceptance of what it means to be "masculine" (or even
"feminine" for that matter).
While I appreciate the spirit of the blog (not sure if I yet fully
appreciate the book), I question the relevance of the above insertion on
masculinity. It appears as though the
only way a man can be credible or give a worthy analysis is if the topic aligns
with a specific perception of manhood.
If not, then the contributor must first qualify his manliness!
Jomo, I would have appreciated your point of view on the
book and its value even if you were wearing a "pink shoe". Of
course, I respond to you in respect of your position even if we disagree. It is simply my desire for us to be mindful
of the subtext to our discourse. 
Angela,
ReplyDeleteThanks for reading the Sankore Institute BlogSpot! I should probably provide a few points of clarification. First, the term "pink shoe" is a euphemism for a homosexual. It does not refer to the literal color of one's shoes. Second, in my original blog entry I took time to explain to the audience that I am an Afrikan heterosexual male. I did this to provide context for my comments. As a reader, I would expect an Afrikan heterosexual male to bring a different perspective to a book written for Black women than would a woman, a caucasian or a homosexual. Finally, while many of my readers know that I am an Afrikan heterosexual male I would not assume that all of them know this.
While I am here I will take a few moments to respond to a question that you raised.
"Culturally, are we on the right side of the discussion/ acceptance of what it means to be "masculine" (or even "feminine" for that matter)."
I don't expect that we are on the same side. So, if that is true (and if there are only two sides), then one of us is definitely on the wrong side. In the world as I understand it, nature provides us with clear markers that distinguish males from females. These markers are sometimes biological, sometimes chemical, sometimes physical and sometimes psychological. For me what it means to be masculine is to be aligned with those natural markers. To do otherwise in unnatural and ultimately leads to unhealthy individuals, parents, families and children.
I don't want to monopolize your blog space. I will take time in the future to address some of the issues you raise. Thanks again fpr reading!
Thanks Jomo for taking the time to read and reply to my response to your blog!
ReplyDeleteOf course I understood your "euphemism" and can only chuckle that you felt the need to further explain/reinforce your position which clearly came through the first time (at least it did for me).
I believe in (and often times celebrate) different world views. I am even more excited when individuals with opposing perspectives can engage in a meaningful discussion. Frankly, I think it is through such discourse and stimulation that we ultimately grow.
I completely respect your right to believe and champion what is important to you. I hope you can respect my inquisition. I have a background in social-psychology and like to question subtexts... especially those that affirm and mock simultaneously.
Until our paths cross again, happy writing and happy reading! :)
Your Fellow Blogger,
Angela